It’s been almost 4 years when I first felt the hardships of being pregnant and carrying the fear of labor. Remembering the times would give me a quick flash back and I literally am taken back to the time when the labor happened. It was really a painful yet fulfilling experience, but I don’t think I’d be ready for another one anytime soon.

As of this writing, I am re-living each and every second on what happened then…

It was early in the morning around 1AM (or was it 2AM) of July 14, 2007 when I felt tremendous pain in my back. I didn’t actually know if that was a sign of labor since it was my first time, but when my mom checked on me and asked me what I was feeling, she knew at once that it was time. She called for the nearest tricycle so that they can take me to the hospital.

When I arrived the hospital, the nurses led me to their delivery room but I was too groggy and wasn’t really sure if my water broke or they had to break it for me. One of them had to put dextrose and I also remembered one of them inserting a needle near my spinal cord which was very painful, and afterwards, I felt a bit numb, that time I was sure it was anesthetics.

When my OB arrived, she asked me to push but I was never aware how it should be done. After almost 2 hours of trying, they asked me if I would rather go for a C-section. I said no and told them that I can do it (which honestly I knew I couldn’t), so they decided to help and pressed my tummy so that I could use more force to push the baby out. I’m not sure if there is a medical term for that (where doctors or nurses had to press the woman’s tummy to induce labor) but it really helped me a lot, though I threw up while they were pressing my tummy because I couldn’t really find my breath. The feeling was really weird and scary.

After 2 hard pushes with the aid of the “tummy-press” the baby was finally born (pardon me but I couldn’t find my old pictures of the newly born).

I didn’t have a name for her for almost 2 days, but finally thought of “Julie Rayne”. Julie for her birth month which is July, and Rayne because it was “raining” when I was on labor.

This is her after we first took her home:

Other pictures of my daughter when she was still a baby:

I was never ready to become a mom then, but I guess as time passes by, I’m getting used to it and the fact that I HAVE TO GROW UP and deal with it and take full responsibility of her. So now, I’m doing the best that I can for my daughter. I love you so much.

A post for this week’s Mommy Moments…